Glossary
Plain definitions of the vocabulary used in femdom and BDSM dynamics. Written for people looking a term up — not for people already inside the scene, and not to sell you anything.
15 terms
- Aftercarecool downAftercare is the deliberate attention given after a scene ends, used to return participants to an ordinary state and to check that what happened landed as intended.
- Degradationdegradation playDegradation is consensual verbal or situational demeaning of a submissive, distinguished from humiliation by being sustained as a frame rather than staged as a moment.
- Dominatrixdomme · mistress · pro-dommeA dominatrix is a woman who takes the dominant role in a BDSM dynamic, directing the encounter rather than following the submissive's requests.
- Edgingpeaking · surfingEdging is the practice of repeatedly approaching the point of orgasm and stopping before it, sustaining arousal without release.
- Findomfinancial domination · findommeFindom, short for financial domination, is a consensual kink in which a submissive gives money or gifts to a dominant, and the act of giving — not what the money buys — is the erotic charge.
- Hard Limitslimits · soft limits · boundariesA hard limit is an activity a participant refuses absolutely and which is never negotiated during a scene; a soft limit is one approached only with care and explicit check-ins.
- Humiliation Kinkerotic humiliation · degradation playA humiliation kink is an erotic response to consensual embarrassment or degradation, where the exposure is arousing precisely because it is negotiated and safe.
- JOIjerk off instruction · guided instructionJOI stands for jerk off instruction: a format in which a dominant partner verbally directs the pace, technique and timing of the other person's masturbation.
- Male Chastitychastity play · orgasm denial · lockedMale chastity is a kink practice in which a submissive gives up control over his own orgasms to a partner, frequently but not always enforced with a physical device.
- Orgasm Controlorgasm denial · climax controlOrgasm control is a kink practice in which one partner holds the decision over whether, when and how the other is allowed to climax, ranging from a single delayed session to indefinite denial.
- Paypigpay pig · cash slave · wallet · fin subA paypig is a submissive in a financial domination dynamic whose role is to give money to a dominant, where the act of paying is itself the submission rather than a purchase of anything.
- Protocolrules · structureProtocol is an agreed set of rules governing how a submissive behaves toward a dominant, which persists outside individual scenes.
- Safewordsafe word · traffic light system · red yellow greenA safeword is an agreed word that immediately stops or slows a scene, used because the ordinary word 'no' may itself be part of the play and therefore cannot be relied on to communicate a genuine stop.
- Submissionsub · submissiveSubmission is the consensual transfer of control to a dominant partner within agreed limits, where the surrender is chosen and can be withdrawn.
- TributeofferingA tribute is a payment or gift given to a dominant as an act of submission, where the giving itself is the gesture rather than payment for a specific service.
Reading about it is not the same as being held to it.
Begin EvaluationFirst messages free · No account required
Fictional AI character. Not a real therapist, counselor, or medical authority. All content is AI-generated entertainment for adults 18+.